Universal has signed a deal with Hasbro to crank out a slew of films based on their branded properties, including Battleship, Candy Land, Clue, Ouija, Stretch Armstrong, Magic the Gathering and yes, Monopoly.
This is weird.
A highly entertaining Clue film has already been made (and they're not going to top that Tim Curry classic), so it's at least conceivable that board games can be made into movies. Sure, Oujia would be a horror movie, Candy Land a kid's movie (and we can only hope they cast Lord Licorice Cool J in there somewhere), Battleship a war movie and Magic could be an elaborate fantasy film. What exactly does one do with Monopoly, one of the most inexplicably popular games there is? Maybe I have too many memories of my father skunking the entire family at that game, but I've never really enjoyed it.
No matter what they do, Sam Elliott has to have the chance to play Rich Uncle Pennybags, the ruthless, unmitigated union-hating, unfair-business-practicing, constant-jail-risking, refusing-to-pay-for-parking plutocrat who has his fingers in every community's chest, never reports bank errors in his favor and occasionally pulls out a win in a beauty pageant. It has to be done.
Comments (1)
Monopoly? As a movie? I can't even pretend to understand.
I like a good boardgame. Settlers of Catan could be an amusing short flick about a forester and a quarry owner beating the crap out of one another to win the hand of a shepherd. Ra could be an Indiana Jones-esque archaeological thriller where humans struggle against the Egyptian Gods periodically wiping out all civilization on a whim. Carcassonne could be a faux medieval flick with an eccentric evil baron, highway robbers, a princess, a dragon, and a ton of bizarrely shaped cities for everyone to romp through.
But Monopoly? Is Hasbro actually trying to insult people? The game itself is so boring they regularly plaster new themes on it in a desperate attempt to breathe new life into a stale franchise. C'mon, if we put a Transformer on the box, fanboys will buy it, right? Same for My Little Ponies, the New York Giants, and the Bible. The movie can be all things for all people, just like the game, which means a total snorefest.
Posted by Chris Rachael Oseland | February 21, 2008 10:19 AM
Posted on February 21, 2008 10:19